September, 30 2008
All change, healing, and correction take place from the inside to the out...in other words, we can make inner changes, which eventually lead us in a new direction or show up as a difference in our appearance, demeanor, attitude or more. How easy it is to forget this. I know this FACT deep in my core so why then am I angry at the property manager who doesn't send over the repairman in a timely way? (Believe me, I have a gazillion examples of where my actions run completely counter to what I believe is the absolute truth.) It looks so convincing -- certainly outside circumstances have NOTHING to do with me or what's going on with me. That guy cut me off -- the bank teller made an error -- my friend insulted me. All of us could make a long list of the slights we have endured and we clearly believe we had contributed nothing to our unhappiness. Even physical pain and discomfort can indicate an inner turmoil. How can we use this information (and that's what it all is...information)? First of all, realize if fear is present because if it is, we can chunk down how real the fear might be. Secondly, we can look at what the benefit might be in having the irritating situation or discomfort or even pain. (I know you are saying, "who wants that -- believe me, it's very subconcious). Third, we can look at the positive side of the situation. It usually takes time to find out what's going on and during that time, we can learn to be patient with ourselves. If we start to see how much power we actually have over our own lives, we can grow and become more of who we want to be. THAT is biggest benefit of all. So remember...inside out. It's true strength.
September, 16 2008
The Eternal Expanding Journey
Isn't that an elegant way to describe the way to wherever we are going -- The Eternal Expanding Journey. We often think that the only way to feel satisfied is to "get there." But what happens when we get there -- we decide to keep going in that direction or another. Until we're "over" there's no over anywhere about anything -- right? I had a client last week and as we talked about this, she kept saying...oh, I know...but she didn't really. This is one of the toughest concepts that we are here to learn -- there is no there, there! As we travel along the path to our goals, we experience joy, tension, hopefulness, despair -- it's all part of the process and yet we rarely understand that simple fact and we keep looking toward the end result as if the pot of gold is at the end of the rainbow. The client last week was unsatisfied with her life and we have all been in that icky place where we didn't feel good about almost anything. What's required is not a change of circumstances but an attitude adjustment -- the change is within us. I recently talked with a colleague who lives on the other coast and she mentioned something about how insecure most people are feeling because outside of us financial institutions are having such a tough time but the security also comes from within. Believe in you. Believe in the process. Enjoy the journey.
September, 07 2008
De-clutter and Be Creative
I have heard probably every excuse invented over why people live in less than ideal settings (too much stuff around and things they don't need and messy) -- They tell me "not enough time;" "not enough money;" "who cares anyway?" "cluttering is a psychological issue;" "I have too much to do to worry about those papers or whatever is in the way."
I don't buy any of it! Most people don't understand how important their surroundings are to their total well-being and success. You waste time if you are continually looking for stuff and clutter is stressful. Plus having a pleasant environment contributes to one's ability to think clearly and be creative.
The first step is to decide to de-clutter and beautify. Then break it down...just start wherever your eyes fall and begin there. Do a little at a time. (My mantra is CHUNK IT DOWN. Personal change takes time and we often give up when we expect to do more than we can comfortably handle.) Keep going until it's done. I know for some people that cleaning up is a herculean task -- get help! Eliminate all excuses and get it done.
You will be more productive, feel lighter, be happier.
August, 24 2008
The Olympics Taught Me
I am sort of surprised that I watched as much of the olympics coverage as I did. I felt that I had a birds-eye view of excellence -- not just with the gold medal winners but all of the wonderful competitors who made it to the games -- that is an achievement of and in itself. But nothing surpasses having your eye on the GOLD. You can handle it if you don't make it but it doesn't mean you don't give everything in the moment. In too many cases to mention, the athlete s went further than they thought they could. I often like to coach myself and so recently I have been asking myself..."Can you do more right now?"..."What else can you bring to this situation?"..."What can you do that you didn't think you could do?"..."Why are you doing it that way AGAIN?"..."Think!"..."Don't give up NOW!" These young athletes have taught me about courage, commitment, and sacrifice. They have demonstrated what it is like to set their sights high, plan for the future and live in the moment. They understand how important it is seek the guidance of others, to listen to their coaches, and to accept the support of their teammates. They show a friendliness to others. They have demonstated that they can be competitive and helpful. (They wouldn't be where they are if they hadn't been extremely competitive and also team players (even in individual sports). They are strong, graceful, energetic, flexible, and seemingless tireless. I got it -- we should all be finding excellence within...This event has helped me up my game too!